Every November I have this sense of dread due to tragic events that occurred more often in this month than any other. These events include bad diagnoses, deaths, and disappointing election results.
Whether Donald Trump’s recent victory was a diagnosis, symptom or cure of where we are as a country will obviously depend on your perspective. Though mine is wrapped up in the struggle between the first two, I am choosing to keep an open mind to his presidency and hopefully be pleasantly surprised. I’m doing this not only so I can sleep better, but also so I can remain an active and engaged participant in this experiment we call democracy.
Regardless of political events and my sometimes-overwhelming fear for what may come to pass, I am trying to shift my focus from generally pessimistic to a bit more positive. This does not mean I’m forcing myself into a Pollyannish point of view, only that I choose to see what is possible rather than not.
It includes striving to be the grateful person I want to see in others. I’ll remain compassionate, courteous and kind to others no matter who they are and how they vote. Little things can make a difference and therefore I’ll continue using turn signals because it’s the right thing to do, and it is what I want other drivers to do as well.
For me to be grateful means I will:
- Recognize that despite reading a reputable daily newspaper now amounts to doom scrolling, the world is a safer and more secure place than any time in history.
- Accept that despite our differences as citizens in this country, I still believe Americans have more in common than what divides us.
- Remain off social media where the abundance of outrage and salacious content drive profit margins at the expense of civility.
- Continually adjust my mentality from one of scarcity to one of abundance and recognize the good fortune I have in family, friends and community.
- Shift my point of view so that the glass some see as half empty will appear half full if I am able to simply raise the glass a little higher.
- See that at the edge of every dark cloud—if I can look closely enough—will find that there is in fact a silver lining.
- Acknowledge that in every interaction there is an opportunity for me to learn something and see the humanity in another person, which can serve as resistance to giving in to apathy or intolerance.
- More frequently express my gratitude in words and deeds to others as it will indeed make them and me happier.
- Recognize that my ability to survive and thrive is not so much dependent on what happens to me as it is in how I react to it. I will not be a passive victim but will instead choose to actively make decisions based on best possible outcomes and accept both the rewards and consequences of those choices.
Expressing gratitude ultimately leads to lower stress, anxiety and depression. Research in positive psychology found that expressing gratitude is also strongly and consistently correlated with greater happiness.
No matter how dire this time may appear, I will take heart this Thanksgiving that there is indeed much more to be thankful for and I will express my gratitude for what I have rather than bemoaning what I don’t or am fearful of.